The Change Room – Episode 25: Love yourself. Tell the truth. Be responsible.

The Change Room – Episode 25: Love yourself. Tell the truth. Be responsible.

Join me and the fabulous Suzy Jacobs on The Change Room Podcast.

How would life be any different if you could love yourself, tell the truth and be responsible? If finding the source of inner peace during the craziest, busiest, most challenging times of life is of interest, stick around to discover the magic of this distinction.

In this episode we discuss:

  • Suzy’s Triple Top Line Questions to sorting opportunities: can I add value, will I have fun and can I make money?
  • Cut-through and power of both the triple distinction and the triple top line questions in making decisions.
  • The 3 keys to the new paradigm.
  • Suzy’s personal experience of this distinction.
  • Mastering the new paradigm by consistently applying the same rigor with these 3 distinctions.
  • The meaning of loving yourself.
  • Transforming your experience of life when you love yourself.

#Thrival Tips for your #Thrival Kit

  • Get to know who this self is that I’m here to be.
  • When in doubt, ask: “what would loving myself look like right now?” And then do that.
  • Use loving yourself, telling the truth and being responsible as a 3-step conscious process for 1 whole day and see what happens.

The Change Room Podcast

with Suzy Jacobs

The Value Of You

The Value Of You

What is the value of you?

If you are tempted to answer this question by first running through a list of all your achievements and judging their value … think again.

The starting place for giving yourself the power to consciously create your life as you want is to look at your current way of valuing yourself and what you do.

There are two distinct meanings for the word value:

  1. Precise meaning or significance – intrinsic
  2. The desirability of a thing often in respect of its usefulness or exchangeability – relative

Obviously, while you confuse the two meanings of the word value, you remain unclear about your own intrinsic value and you remain confused about who you are and what you can do.

As long as you judge yourself on the basis of relative worth when compared to others, and stay focused on proving you are good/right rather than capable … you don’t have time for much else, it becomes a relentless circle and nothing changes.

If on the other hand, you value yourself for your capacity to BE who you are and choose what you want to DO, then you are free to choose again … and again.

So let go of the good enough stuff, the right/wrong, the good/bad and simply let yourself acknowledge the intrinsic value of who you are AND what you have done which has resulted in whatever is happening. Let go of diverting into explanations and justifications and simply tell the truth about the whole of your reality including acknowledging the value.

As long as you devalue yourself by saying you are not as good or as capable as someone else, because your exchange rate is not seen to be as high, you assume that your ability to create your life as you want it to be is also of limited possibility and value. This is simply not so.

You will discover this for yourself when you are willing to accept that the value of you is that you are YOU … powerful creative being able to choose. When you acknowledge the whole of what is so including that the whole of what you have created has value and take responsibility for it, then you can create anything you can think of.

Love Lorna

Value yourself.
The only people who appreciate a doormat are people with dirty shoes.

Leo F. Buscaglia

Getting To Be Good Enough

Getting To Be Good Enough

Not going to happen … not now … not ever.

The whole “good-enough/not-good-enough” stuff is based on a lie.

And if you are not conscious of it, it runs you.

It’s insidious and deep and sticky and in my experience never really “goes away”. The “not-good-enough” story is on a permanent loop in your ego-mind and it just keeps on playing. You get to choose whether you keep agreeing with it or not. You get to choose how to respond and you get to keep choosing.

The quest for “good enough” is really just a search for a feeling of being ok. A feeling of peace and security instead of feeling “not-good-enough” and the emotions that come with it … shame, hurt, anxious, etc.  So you seek to feel “better”, usually by doing more and more in the hope you will get to be “good enough”.

Well, getting to be good enough is a myth.

Who you are is a magnificent, powerful, loveable creative being and has nothing to do with “good-enough” or “not-good-enough”. Those are both polar opposite judgements about whatever is happening. And as soon as you agree that the judgement about what’s happening is actually about you the creator, rather than about what you have created, down the rabbit hole of fear you go.

So next time the “not-good enough” stuff arises … stop … take a breath … remind yourself this is a feeling, not a fact … breathe …allow the feeling to move through you and release … and it will when you give up your “not-good enough” stuff.

Love Lorna

If your goal in life is to become all that you are
give up the “not-good-enough” stuff
and realise yourself.

Nobody’s Perfect

Nobody’s Perfect

I have been hearing this a lot lately … and although many agree … I do not.

Actually I know that YOU are perfect, in fact, every single human being is actually perfect although you will not accept this premise from the fear driven paradigm of “not good enough”.

When you say you are not perfect, what you actually mean is your behaviour is not perfect, not ideal, not saintly … simply put … not good enough.

And there it is again, when you forget WHO you really are and think that what you DO defines your “perfection” or otherwise, you end up on the relentless roller-coaster of doing more to get approval, agreement or acceptance. It’s a sticky trap of self-judgement and self-criticism that keeps you on the wheel of “never good enough” and on it goes.

WHO you are is perfect LOVE and what you do sometimes reflects this and sometimes does not. When you decide that how you behave defines your okayness, it’s a lie that you tell yourself in order to justify your relentless doing, doing, doing in pursuit of excellence and avoidance of others’ judgement and it never works.

Accept your intrinsic and inherent perfection – WHO you are BEING – as a context for whatever you do and it will be much easier to do “better”. When you let go of needing to DO everything perfectly in order to BE (and feel) ok, you can choose to do whatever you want to do. When you fully own that you are OK and then choose to feel how you want to feel rather than letting your judgement of what you have done inform your feeling state, you will “get better” naturally.

Love Lorna

Perfection is a state in which things are the way they are, and are not the way they are not. As you can see, this universe is perfect. Don’t lie about it.

Werner Erhard

Wake Up!

Wake Up!

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I will challenge you to start noticing what is really going on inside you and outside you and to notice what level of awareness you are walking around with. To “wake up” is to arouse yourself enough to be present where you are and to become aware of yourself and others and the world you live in.

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