How To Let Go

How To Let Go

The first step in letting go of anything is to acknowledge that you are holding on … to the stories and the movies in your head, to the stuff of the past that you bring into your present by feeling today just like you felt yesterday about whatever has occurred. Tell the truth about what you are hanging onto and then you can choose to let go.

Simple … and not easy when unresolved feelings are involved and your wounded internal 3 year old just wants for things to be “made right”.

And here it is … again. The unhealed emotional wounds from past experiences keep you stuck in reliving those experiences in the here and now over and over again … and nothing much changes.

And it won’t as long as you keep recycling those memories and experiences and all the meaning you gave with the hope of working out “why” all this stuff happened to you and how you can get a different outcome. You cannot change the past … but you can change what happens next if you are willing to consider shifting yourself from a context of “victim/persecutor/rescuer” (The Old Paradigm of Fear) to a context of “I Create The Whole Of My Own Reality” (The New Paradigm of Love).

What if nothing really “happens to you” but rather everything “happens for you?”

Being willing to accept that you are powerful, that you are the cause of everything in your reality whether you are aware of causing it or not, frees you to accept that you have created everything for your growth and benefit not for your detriment. Then you are free to choose again.

When you accept everything in your reality as yours, you are free to hang on or let go.

The choice is always…yours.

Love Lorna

In the process of letting go
you will lose many things from the past
but you will find yourself.

Deepak Chopra

Let It Go

Let It Go

Another year has dawned and with it comes the perfect time to write a new chapter for yourself and your life.

So who will you BE and what will you choose this year?

If you find this question exciting and inspiring … a chance to dream big and choose boldly … go for it.

And if you find this question daunting and a bit scary … if it brings up concerns about what is the “right thing” to choose … consider this as a strategy … let it go!

Let go of the worry and the fear about getting it “right”, let go of the notion that there is a “right” way to BE or DO or HAVE. Get present in your body … breathe … and let yourself imagine who you choose to BE and what you choose to DO to HAVE what you choose to manifest. Then write it down, or draw a picture, or make a collage/vision board and let yourself go.

When you let go of worry you free yourself to create that which your heart desires. When you source your dreams from love rather than fear you connect with the universal energy of creation and harness the power of the whole universe to support you Being, Doing and Having in ways that will delight you.

Fear constricts and diminishes … love expands and illuminates … and always the most profound choice you can make is to let go of fear and embrace love.

My context for 2016 is let it go … specifically letting go of my fearful, future focussed ego-mind chatter and staying present and connected with who I am choosing to be in each moment irrespective of what I am doing. I am choosing to accept, allow and appreciate whatever occurs – particularly when it is not what I expect! I choose to consciously participate in the whole of my reality as creator rather than victim and to remember that I always have a choice to hang on or let it go.

Unshakeable inner peace is my goal … and the best way I know to experience inner peace is to relentlessly let go and keep letting go internally of anything that is not peaceful.

Love Lorna

The day I understood everything,
was the day I stopped trying to figure everything out.
The day I knew peace was the day I let everything go.

C. JoyBell C.

Giving Can Be Hard To Take

Giving Can Be Hard To Take

As a child, I was told that it’s better to give than to receive and at the same time I was also told I must be grateful and thankful when given to … no matter how I felt about the “gift” or the giver.

The resultant confusion stemming from this childhood conditioning set-up a belief pattern in me that said giving is ok (and it feels good) but taking (receiving) really is not (and it feels uncomfortable).

Every time someone acknowledged me, I felt an immediate need to push back, give something in return and avoid letting myself fully receive. I was always keen to be the first to offer help; to pick up the tab for coffee or a meal; to give happily whenever I saw an opportunity. What I didn’t realise was that my need to be the “giver” left very little space for anyone to truly give to me. My reluctance to “take” was preventing others the joy of giving to me.

I realised (once again) this was my fearful ego-mind fuelling the notion that I didn’t deserve it or hadn’t worked hard enough/done enough/given enough to really be worthy of being given to. The old not-good-enough stuff … again!!

So I chose to learn how to truly give and receive. I decided to simply say thank you when someone offered to pay for the coffee, to say thank you when someone gave me something … an acknowledgement, some help, advice or a gaily wrapped package! I also chose to respond to the feelings that arise, to acknowledge my “childish” reactions and allow the feelings to release without having to give in to the story and the drama over and over. It’s not easy … I still have times when I feel uncomfortable receiving. And when I do, I stop and take a deep breath and remind myself … it’s a feeling, not a fact … let it go … and let myself receive anyway.

There is no real giving without receiving. Two sides of the same coin and when one side is missing … there is no integrity … no wholeness.

So the next time someone gives you something … say thank you. In that, you will know the joy of receiving which is a gift to the giver.

Love Lorna

Don’t be so greedy with your giving …


Being Kind Trumps Criticism

Being Kind Trumps Criticism

I’ve had a revelation this past week … being kind trumps criticism!

It started with a visit to Sydney by my sister for her 60th birthday. We have a close relationship yet sometimes I find it very challenging to be kind rather than critical of her behaviour when I do not agree.  It is an old habit and one I have found very difficult to break. This time I chose to be conscious and aware of my own insidious tendency to get stuck in my head, ramping up the infernal, internal dialogue of criticism and judgement.

It started well, I felt peaceful and detached and told myself that whatever happened, I was going to be loving and kind … and it was going really well for about 2 hours! Then something happened and straight away I felt myself getting frustrated and the internal judgemental, critical chatter began: “why is she doing this?” “She should know better” “Is she just doing this to get at me” etc etc. I didn’t say anything, I just felt it all swirling around in my head and in my body. And then I realised my sister was reacting to my judgemental energy … I didn’t need to voice my criticism because she could feel it emanating from me anyway … and then she started to react in kind.

What happened next is what began to change everything …

Rather than simply engaging in the old habit of pushing back and fuelling the A<>B conversation, instead of needing to be “right” by making her “wrong” … I stopped, I took a breath and I chose to let go of my critical thinking, I chose to let go of needing her to change so I felt better, I chose to connect with being loving rather than agree once again with my fearful thinking … and I felt my energy shift.

And so did hers!

I experienced a profound sense of peace and the weekend continued as I had consciously intended … loving, kind, peaceful and lots of fun. Oh yes, we had a few more moments of tension sprinkled throughout the next 3 days yet the cloying stickiness of the internal judge had loosened somewhat so neither of us got stuck like rats on the wheel of our old painful way of relating.

Once again the message was simple … though not at all easy!

Being kind, being loving, being who I AM … particularly when challenged by someone I love … produces a loving response in return.

Love Lorna

Be kind whenever possible.
It is always possible.

Dalai Lama

It’s Never About The Money!

It’s Never About The Money!

One thing guaranteed to trap you in an endless fear-fuelled, ego-mind whirlpool of infernal, internal self-critical dialogue is a perceived lack/shortage of money.

In fact, there is nothing like the “money conversation” to start a whirlpool of emotional turmoil that has nowhere to go but inward, ever inward …

And yet, it’s NEVER about the money.

No matter how much you want to resist what I am saying and convince me that it really is a lack of money that stops you from being, doing and having what you say you want, I know it’s not about the money.

In the paradigm of cause, money is just a form of energy and as such shows you where your energy is flowing and where it is blocked.  When you decide you want something, then say “I can’t afford it” or “I can’t have it because I don’t have the money” you get to be right. You don’t get to have what you say you want … and you do get to be right … because whatever you believe is true is what you will experience. So every time you say “I can’t …” you are affirming what you believe and you manifest exactly that, the experience of lack, of not enough, of “I cannot …”

This insidious loop is simply another form of the “not good enough” stuff and every time you buy into it, you keep yourself safe from having to confront the whole truth about who you are and what’s actually going on.

And there it is … who you are is powerful beyond measure. Who you are is divine, perfect love. Who you are is able to create and manifest anything you can imagine … if only you would let yourself go there instead of running down the rabbit hole of not good enough when you feel scared.

Remember, feelings are NOT facts … feel the feelings, let go and choose who you want to be and what you want to do and have … then respond to whatever shows up from the paradigm of Love and you’ll discover, it’s never about the money!

Love Lorna

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate,
our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure

Marianne Williamson

Pin It on Pinterest