Inside Out

Inside Out

As I approach the end of another calendar year, I find myself reflecting on the year that has been and marvelling at the complexity and the simplicity both locally and globally.

There can be no doubt that this year brought a multitude of fascinating, frustrating and illuminating mirrors in the form of various world leaders and local friends and foes.

When I found myself awash in the sheer lunacy of what I was seeing and experiencing, the only relief I sought was to go within and ask myself one key question: “What would love do now?” Because any other location or any other question was not going to deliver what I sought … peace.

And that, my friends, is what I am taking away with me for my annual holiday with family. That the only true path to peace is within. There is no sustainable peace or joy or happiness on offer when I am attached to and hell bent on making my external reality meet my expectations. After many years of relentlessly going down that rabbit hole, I have discovered that if I truly want inner peace then I must go within and choose to BE at peace.

There is nothing I can control or make happen in my external world. No amount of persuasion will make someone feel what I want them to feel or do what I want them to do or be how I want them to be. And yet the divine dichotomy in the paradigm of cause is that I have created all of it and yet I control none of it.

When I remember I create the whole of my own reality with love and wisdom – always – I can relax and let go and allow myself to appreciate the complexity and the simplicity of the whole and trust that there is purpose in all of it. Then I get to choose how I want to BE in relationship to whatever is occurring and thus transform not just my internal state but also my experience of my external reality including how I experience you.

Just need to remember … I get to choose.

Love Lorna

Being Kind Trumps Criticism

Being Kind Trumps Criticism

I’ve had a revelation this past week … being kind trumps criticism!

It started with a visit to Sydney by my sister for her 60th birthday. We have a close relationship yet sometimes I find it very challenging to be kind rather than critical of her behaviour when I do not agree.  It is an old habit and one I have found very difficult to break. This time I chose to be conscious and aware of my own insidious tendency to get stuck in my head, ramping up the infernal, internal dialogue of criticism and judgement.

It started well, I felt peaceful and detached and told myself that whatever happened, I was going to be loving and kind … and it was going really well for about 2 hours! Then something happened and straight away I felt myself getting frustrated and the internal judgemental, critical chatter began: “why is she doing this?” “She should know better” “Is she just doing this to get at me” etc etc. I didn’t say anything, I just felt it all swirling around in my head and in my body. And then I realised my sister was reacting to my judgemental energy … I didn’t need to voice my criticism because she could feel it emanating from me anyway … and then she started to react in kind.

What happened next is what began to change everything …

Rather than simply engaging in the old habit of pushing back and fuelling the A<>B conversation, instead of needing to be “right” by making her “wrong” … I stopped, I took a breath and I chose to let go of my critical thinking, I chose to let go of needing her to change so I felt better, I chose to connect with being loving rather than agree once again with my fearful thinking … and I felt my energy shift.

And so did hers!

I experienced a profound sense of peace and the weekend continued as I had consciously intended … loving, kind, peaceful and lots of fun. Oh yes, we had a few more moments of tension sprinkled throughout the next 3 days yet the cloying stickiness of the internal judge had loosened somewhat so neither of us got stuck like rats on the wheel of our old painful way of relating.

Once again the message was simple … though not at all easy!

Being kind, being loving, being who I AM … particularly when challenged by someone I love … produces a loving response in return.

Love Lorna

Be kind whenever possible.
It is always possible.

Dalai Lama

What Do You Really Want For Christmas?

What Do You Really Want For Christmas?

It’s that time of year again … summer is in the air (in our southern hemisphere) and Christmas is fast approaching.

So what do you want?

When asked that question, many people often experience anxiety and react like a rabbit caught in the headlights … wary, anxious or frozen.

When faced with a blank piece of paper and a pen and the encouragement to write down whatever you want, whatever you can imagine, what do you do?

Do you get scared to dream BIG and ask for what you really want?
Do you hold back, play small and ask for what you feel is appropriate/reasonable/not too much?
Do you say “I don’t know” because you can’t figure out how you are ever going to get what you really want?

Or do you go for it, ask for exactly what you want and open yourself to receive?

The reluctance to ask for what you want is yet another ego-mind control tactic designed to ensure you stay at the effect of your “not-good-enough” thoughts and feelings. The infernal internal critic chants “don’t ask for too much”, “you don’t deserve to have everything you desire” “stop being greedy and selfish” and on and on.

I know, you DO know what you want. And I also know it’s not “stuff” that you really want. It’s love and joy and peace and fun. It’s connection and communication and inspiration and contribution. It’s in BEING who you are that you get to DO and HAVE what you really want … and that’s what you really, really, really want.

Love Lorna

All I want for Christmas is … YOU.

Enough is Enough!

Enough is Enough!

Enough of the constant noise of fear and anxiety and confusion … in the world, in the street, in the office and in the home (and in our heads!).

Enough of our leaders behaving like children who won’t share or play nicely together.

Enough of thinking that the world will get to be a place of peace and joy by continually fighting with each other and ourselves in the name of right!

Everywhere I go these days I am conscious of how much anxiety runs our lives and our world. Fear is the currency of power and control and polarity and we have created a world rich and abundant in fearful thinking, doing and feeling. Ever forgetful about who we are, we are convinced we are powerless to affect real change, we are scared of being powerful, magnificent, creative loving beings. Well enough is enough!

It’s time to step-up, show up and say enough of the illusion of fear, enough of being held hostage to the pervasive paradigm of power and control … enough already.

The antidote to this insane way of being and doing and thinking and feeling is very simple …

It comes down to LOVE.

Love as a context NOT as a romantic, idealised feeling state. Love is the whole of us all, the heart of each and every one of us and must be appreciated and acknowledged and lived as a moment by moment choice until it’s a solid habit.

Time to be and do and have and share love.

Love Lorna

Love is nothing you can demonstrate or prove. It’s what you are.

Byron Katie

How To Love Yourself

How To Love Yourself

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What happens when you don’t put yourself first and give yourself the love you so freely give to other people? Loving yourself is simple, but that doesn’t mean it’s easy. Loving yourself is the only thing that really makes a difference to the quality of your life, so why is it that the whole notion of self-love is the single biggest issue that human beings have? Make sure you watch my video to find out what it is you need to be clear about if you want to learn to love yourself.

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